teenage angst [according to kimberly. haha.]

new skin. obviously. just thought that fate wanted me to change my blogskin already after the template mysteriously got destroyed. haha.

anyway. today was really a nightmare. i mean, besides technology, in which we had a really challenging test for a change, [not that i'm bragging or what, i just really find programming challenges fun. haha.], i had to endure a long string of uninteresting subjects. imagine, PHYSICS [discussions], MATH [sw], AP [quiz], ENGLISH [it was okey actually], FILIPINO [urgh. writing activity! >.<], chinese [what else?]

well, today, i was really feeling depressed, which is EXTREMELY bad, because of how totally trivial the reason behind the depression is. really, its stupid. and im not supposed to be that low. i cant worry about these things when there's math, physics and english to worry about. but still, its unexplainable, im just feeling really bad. weird. i promise not to worry much anymore.

fortunately, the load of the journal was lifted from our shoulders. haha. a letter to mrs.tiu is definitely easier than 6 journal entries. hehe. :)

still, after yesterday, today SuCkS.

grr,

my god.
nagkamali ako.
will be changing skin soon.
haha.
d k n mhnap code n2 eh..
:D

what a game that was..

the ateneo-ust finals game yesterday was amazing. just to recount, in case you weren't able to watch it. haha.

ust leads by 1, kramer shoots, with 20 seconds on the clock.
timeout.
ust ball, inbound. intal intecepts it, but referee calls a backcourt violation, so still ust ball.
timeout.
ust misses the shot. ball goes out of bounds. referee declares ust ball. 4 seconds left.
timeout.
espiritu shoots a jumper with just a second left.
timeout.
the PERFECT PASS from escalona to kramer. layup. ADMU wins! haha..

oh well. it was just the fate of the ateneo.. haha. :)


hahaha. can u see me? waha.. :D
as some of you may know, i am an altar server at our parish, and yesterday, i celebrated my 1st year anniversay as one, because we had our commissioning. it was weird. during the homily of the priest, a dog suddenly entered the church , and just practically lied on the front part of th church. weird. and then, right after the mass, it went out, as if it, too, attended our commissioning. haha.

earlier this day, we [tech club people] attended an 'IT congress' in UE. and all i can say is they LOVE singing.. and dancing.. and performing. hahaha
erlyn made a way to make us seat in this *ahem* 'perfect' arrangement. haha.
we walked out of the congress, against our wills. haha. really, i did not learn much about animation, half the time i was covering my ears from the deafening voice of the speaker. haha. we didn't even get to join the raffle. hehe..

after which, we returned to school ang got our excuse slips.. and then we went t the library, almost just to wait for the bell to ring. [ 4:59?? ] haha..

well. today was fun, though im still bitter i wont be included in the training on wednesday..aww, i wont see brian. JOKE LANG. haha. :D

btw..gawa kmi p6 proj s house k on friday. kimberly danielle and JO. think it would be fun. haha. :)

missed updating this. haha.

for the first time, i fell asleep going home today. i reall do lack sleep already.. haha

oh well. jed and kimberly both won 2nd place in their respective contests. ironic really, because jed has just won 1st place in a recent interschool extempo competition [10000?! wow..haha. ] and yet he couldn't defeat a certain 3rd year person who knew the scientific name of the dengue mosquito, which was the topic of their supposed speeches. who can forget her after her "Ladies, gentlemen and friends" show in the English version of the same competition? haha. no offense to her. :)

while watching continuous presentations in different contests, we played these tarot cards of oliver due to unavoidable boredom. haha. the cards were supposedly going to answer the question you concentrated on while shuffling and arranging the cards in a given position. middle card would state your question, left and right cards would say something about your past and future respectively, and top and bottom cards would show things involved. here were my results on a certain try:

Problem: something with a "Man or a Boy" / "Uncertainty" / "Haste"
Past: something about "Envy" / "Greed"
Future: something with "Unity" / "Loyalty" / "Strength"
Things involved: "Woman or a Girl" / "Young people"

or at least that was how we interpreted it, considering the really vague instructions. haha. but honestly, it did kinda answer my question.. hehe. :)

the 'masining na pagkwento' contest, i thought, and toni agrees with me, was not accurately judged. i think the judges were somehow influenced by the multitude of people cheering for this 1st year guy, not to mention the fact that he was really cute, and i mean a grade3 student kind of cute. hahaha. :)

although i did not win in the essay thing, and the winners were not forced to wear filipiniana costumes anymore, im not really bitter. in the first, i know that that wasn;t my thing. i mean, hello? me, filipino essayist? or any essayist for that matter? no way. haha. just read this blog's stupid entries for a start. haha..and i know thea deserved to win. :)

for the literature contest, i was admiitedly a little disappointed. the quesions were really things i haven't yet heard of. haha. but honestly, i did not like the mechanics, [dictating multiple chice questions], but im not blaming my loss on that. haha. i had , what, only 5 certain answers? haha..but still.. it was disapponting..

oh yeah, coincidentally my number in both contests was 12. weird, its like fate wants me to hate the number. im sorry, you failed. i still love the number..cant wait for the jacket. haha..

after the program, we ate lunch out, and considering we were with J and T, and another pair of people id rather not directly mention, ,me, my brother and eric were understandably left out. haha..which was why i suddenly texted other people.. haha..:)

talking about yesterday, i could really relate with sir limuaco's life story, being forced into a course and all. hehe..

and honestly, in the locker, i really thought we were already gonna talk or something.. but well.. haha..just wanna say congratulations for all the contests you won this past week. haha..hope you are able to read my handwriting.. haha ..wag mo n i4get ung date khpon ah. waha joke lang.. its not that important..:)

still no news from southville..
still have to do my paper..
still ahve to start the physics project..
still have to think about stuff..

haha.

after 3 times...

toni, erlyn.. i finally found my song, i think. haha. but its not that good eh. astig lang super ung 1st stanza.. XD

CAN THIS BE LOVE?

Can this be love I'm feeling right now
I know for certain I'm feeling right now
I don't recall ever feeling this way
Tell me what does one say
To one who makes me feel this way
Can this be love I'm feeling right now
I am not sure of this feeling somehow
Why do I tremble whenever you're near
I can't seem to say my words so you'll hear


CHORUS:
This is the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"
It's the first time I ever felt so helpless deep inside
If I had to say a thousand times I'd tell you once again
This is the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"


Can this be love I'm feeling right now
I love the feeling it's giving me now
A voice inside me is guiding me now
It's telling me now
To take your hand and say


CHORUS:
This is the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"
It's the first time I ever felt so helpless deep inside
If I had to say a thousand times I'd tell you once again
This is the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"
This is the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"
It's the first time I ever felt so helpless deep inside
If I had to say a thousand times I'd tell you once again
This is the first time
This is the first time
It's the first time I'm gonna say "I love you"

hahaha.
moving on..

i was exempted from english classes today to "train" for the southville thing, which still has not called the school, after 1 week and a half already. I really despise the southville people who are supposed to inform us. they're taking too long, making us worry so much. haha.

training today was fun. i met new people who are exceptionally good in history, namely Kelly Lee (?) and Bryan Bautista from II-5.. and Aldrin Co ang Garner Tan of III-5. gudluck s contest nyo s 30. sna may contest din kmi on that day.. haha

fieldtrip. cant believe that only 6 will go from section 3, and 7 from section 4. shocks. i mean, i know its expensive, but well, id really like to treasure a lot of memories from high school, and it is already 4th year.. hai, you're right erlyn.. time flies so fast this year. yeah, it is flying especially fast this year. it's like time wants us to hurry and get to college, but time, i DONT want to go to college yet, at least not at the moment. hehe.

back to the Ftrip, some people are already worrying about who sits beside whom.. like "blah blah should sit beside blah blah." or "will blah blah be sitting with blah blah?" whatever. [ksama b ko dun s mga nagwoworry?? hahahaha]

FYI, this is the third time i have typed this particular entry. nagsasara bigla ung firefox eh. haha. lesson learned, wag s blogger agad magtype, s MS Word muna. hahaha.

people, wish me luck pla s friday.. im really feeling useless this year.. bhala n dun. tamad ako magreview eh. haha.

btw, grabe, ang galing mo, i mean, nyo pla.. hope magcontinue streak nyo until saturday. :)

a schedule of events. haha

Today was definitely a day of mixed emotions. 

Physics was wonderful, we just performed this activity about the
coefficient of restitution,for which I wrote an unnecessarily
long conclusion. Don't know why. haha

Math was as monotonous as usual. No surprises there, but hey, you
have to give Mrs. M credits for doing activities outside math.

AP was disappointing, totally. Oh well. Who cares, really.

Double English was *gasp* great. I mean, The Odyssey was way
better than the subject despite the hideous clothes the
characters wore, not to mention Penelope who almost looked
like Mrs. Delmo at some angles. Hilarious. Haha. 

Filipino. Nothing you can do there, I think. It's just, well, Filipino.
Add to that the "medyo slightly green jokes" of our teacher.
=according to bless. Haha :)

Chinese? don't even ask. haha. i just slept through recess

Just noticed, why did people suddenly have their hair cut?  Haha.
Wla lang. 4 guys in our room had their hair cut eh. Hehe. :)

Btw. Nabasa n nman ako ng ulan. Grabe. Hahaha.

Still haven't started my paper. Hay, according to eric, il
probably start it October n daw. Wag nman sna. Haha.

Knna pla uwian, ksma ko c * at *. Wla lang. in other people's words, "was I disturbing?" haha. Nkk2wa tlga clang dalawa. [don't kill me please. Peace tau. Haha. ]

weird. totally..

weird.
im happy.
haha.
ang nonsense k magsalita grabe.
im just happy for people,
including myself.
hehe..

anyway.
narealize k lang..
this song is like super ganda..[yuck! ang cono..hahaha]

START OF SOMETHING NEW
Living in my own world,
Didn't understand
That anything can happen
When you take a chance.
I never believed in
What I couldn't see,
I never opened my heart,
To all the possibilities.
I know that something has changed, never felt this way,
And right here tonight


This could be the start of something new,
It feels so right to be here with you,
And now looking in your eyes, I feel in my heart,
The start of something new.



Now who'd have ever thought that,
We'd both be here tonight? 
And the world looks so much brighter,
With you by my side,
I know that something has changed, never felt this way!
I know it's for real.


This could be the start of something new,
It feels so right to be here with you,
And now looking in your eyes, I feel in my heart,
The start of something new.


I never knew that I could happen 'til it happened to me,
I didn't know it before, but now it's easy to see,


That it's the start of something new,
It feels so right to be here with you,
And now looking in your eyes, I feel in my heart,
The start of something new,
The start of something new,
The start of something new.

hahaha..
wla lang. :)
sorry for my extreme weirdness these days.
prang obvious nman kung bakit db?
haha..
whatever you're thinking, mali un.
hehehe..

~smiLe~
^_^

people who have made [or making? ] my senior year great..

abi..
crisselle..
danielle..
darren..
eric..
eric II..
erlyn..
kimberly..
ian..
mark..
toni..

wla lang. haha. :)

...

updating this blog again. haha. took advantage of my sister being out of the house eh, because i may not update for a long time again after this..

so what do i have to write about?

actually, that reminds me.. i have to write my paper for english. it's been way overdue already because i was planning to write it last week. but well, time is not in my hands..

again, that reminds me.. our wonderful report in values yesterday about time! haha.. against everything i expected of our group, the report turned out great.. even the game i thought of on the spot was amazing. haha..talk about luck..

luck..exactly what made me enter the literature thing.. it also prevented me from being the quizmaster in the computer quiz bee yesterday. but hey, im not complaining. Lalaine was great, way better than what i could have done. hehe. besides, at least danielle eric and ken won. im kind of excited for the interschool computer contests already..

speaking of which, southville results.. does it really take this long? or did we just not get in? i hope not.. im really looking forward to another training day, i mean they're like super fun.. we usually talked during these training days.. haha.. especially that time before my bio contest.. astig..

people are taking acet today.. hay, i still am bitter about not taking it.. and what's worse, people keep forgetting that im not taking, which drives me mad. haha

that's what i am right now, mad. madly in love? hmm... probably madly tired. haha

an answer to things..^_^

Contrary to what you're probably thinking, I'm not updating my blog for the sake of updating it. Hello? It's not as if I care for my beloved blog as much as I used to. No, I'm updating because after reading his entries, I felt an urge to, and sometimes urges are supposed to be followed. Haha.

It may sound stupid, but actually the idea is ingenious, using the blog as a network of communication for things we just cannot openly talk about.

Yeah, I'm talking abut my LL. This is my second entry about it, but as you may have noticed, the first one is missing. I didn't delete it though, it's just not published. Why? Well, because I think it has served its purpose, though at first, it really did not have a purpose at all. Weird, I know. But well, here's the second one..

I find it almost funny how different we are in person from what we are in text messaging and chat. I mean, I think the only time we can properly talk with each other in person is when the whole world is not looking, and that does not happen very often. But I don't blame him for it. In fact, I can't blame anyone for it. Our worlds are just so far apart that they rarely meet. We're like in opposite sides of the room, and our circles of friends just barely intersect. The worse thing is, *someone* is included in my circle and I think he also has *another someone* in his, which obviously causes misunderstandings.

Speaking of her, I hate to admit it, but I can't deny that I'm just jealous of her every time she's with him. I mean, I know it's not something I should feel because I don't have the right to, but it's not like I can control my hypothalamus from secreting hormones that give me this emotion, right? It's involuntary, unlike my skeletal muscles. Haha. Reasoning out. Probably got it from Toni.

Anyway, it's only minimal. But still, I was so relieved when I read his entries. It kind of gave me assurance when I was already seriously doubting everything. Yet, after everything that's been happening with us, I'm not actually sure where we're going. Oh well. Come what may.

But really, you are the only one. Haha.

absurdly out of the topic, Ken won 1st place, followed by Eric and Danielle, in the computer contest at school. They would be joining me in interschool competitions. yey. :)

And, yeah, i got in the top15 in the literature contest but i think i may have lost the essay writing contest. hehe.